When I was young, I heard a song that indicated that the Christian life provided a straightforward pathway. All one had to do was profess faith in Jesus, and suddenly one lived stress-free and happy all the time. I grew up thinking that something was wrong with me because I did not follow the line of thinking that appeared to ignore the problems I faced.

As I grew into adulthood, I struggled with the issue of faith. I thought, “I must be a mistake because I wrestle with issues.” I often felt like the ancient Israelites in captivity as they asked, “How can I sing the Lord’s song in a strange land?” (Ps. 137:4 KJV). I never felt at home in my faith because I could not reconcile the joy of my salvation with the trials and tribulations I faced in life.

Eventually, to rediscover my belief in Jesus, I had to deconstruct my faith. In doing so, I realized that the promise of a life free of pain proved unattainable. Jesus suffered in this life, so why should I have a free pass? He struggled and often prayed to His God to provide clarity and peace. To think I would possess a life free of hurt and conflict is to place myself above my Savior.

I aim to remember 24/7 that when trials come, and they will come, I am not alone. Jesus is with me and hears my cries, even when I am not joyful. The promise of my salvation is the covenant that Emmanuel (God with us) shares my burdens and never leaves me. So, in times of struggle, the peace I come to know is that whatever worries I carry, a heavenly sanctuary provides me with a safe harbor from the storm.