This past week we began our stewardship season with a focus on prayer.  I was grateful to focus on this important part of my faith journey, as it reminded me of a very sacred moment when my oldest boy was a baby.  He was about four months old, and I laid him down in his crib.  I was still trying to process his diagnosis of severe hemophilia.  I kept hoping that we would overcome the odds and everyone discover that this was a misdiagnosis.

We were told that the first 6-9 months of his life would be a “honeymoon” period.  We would not see the bad bruising due to the fact that he wasn’t walking.  When he started moving around, we began to see the bruises that would make any of us without a bleeding disorder cringe.  Bruises on my son would eventually look like he had been beaten, while in reality he could have just rolled over on to something, or casually bump his shoulder while walking.

For now, he was a four month old baby; safe and sound in his crib.  I remember standing over him, wishing that I could protect him from the eventual pain that an internal bleed would cause.  In that instant, I felt helpless.  There was only one thing that I knew I could do for him.  I prayed.  I placed my hand on his back and asked God to guide him in all of his steps.  I asked for wisdom as we sought out the best care available for my son.  I asked for peace for him, for my family, and for my friends as they watched him grow.

In the stillness of the evening, I surrendered my son to the care of God.  I realized that my hope centered around the power that could be given to me through Divine healing and wholeness.  This holy presence is the headwaters of my faith.  Inviting me in and surrounding me with strength and assurance.

The little four month old boy has turned into a mighty nineteen year old man.  He is full of promise and a passion for music that he shares with his parents.  His bleeding disorder is completely managed, with minimal discomfort.  He infuses a clotting agent three times a week.  This has been our saving grace.

Today I am grateful for this son of mine, and the many life lessons that he continues to teach me.  He is amazingly talented, and tenderhearted.  I know that I am biased, but I think he is amazing.  I like to think that God taught me what to do in all circumstances.  Reach my hand out and pray.  Praise be to God for the people that reveal how the Spirit dwells in us, showing others the wonders of God.  My son reminds me that we are made in God’s image, bleeding disorders and all.

Published by joekmac

I am a pastor in the United Methodist Tradition. I am the Pastor of First United Methodist Church of Belen in the New Mexico Annual Conference. I am married to Cazandra and have two sons with hemophilia.

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