So, this journey through the wilderness comes to one of the roughest bends in the road that I seem to face, what would have happened if I would have ….. Looking at this statement causes me great anxiety and doubt. Did I make the right choices? Is this the plan God had for me? It all leads to one question, “Am I Happy?”
First, I turn my attention to the road I didn’t take. The problem is there is nothing concrete down the path, so I make up things. Down this route, every dream, every wish that I ever thought I wanted is granted. Of course, I am happy and fulfilled. It is make believe, so anything can happen.
The reality is that we do not know what that path looks like. It will always be a mystery. To fret over a life not lived is to lose sight of a life full of love and hope. I look around me now and see blessings beyond anything I could ever have imagined. That includes before I made my choice to travel down my current road.
I made a pastoral visit to a member of my congregation today, and she has tons of signs on the walls of her front patio one reads, “It’s not about having what you want, but wanting what you have.” As I read the sign, I gave thanks for my life and the choices I made. Yes, sometimes the road gets a little bumpy, and sometimes I think, “Oy! Do I have to do this?” And then I remember, I am very fortunate to have a family that looks to me for leadership and inspiration. I am honored to be the pastor of an incredible congregation. All of these things are real and tangible. The other road pales in comparison.
Today I am grateful for my journey and the people that share in all that it means to be human. I know that the untraveled life will always look inviting, but who knows what lies around the corner? I’ll gladly take this life, and be grateful for everything that lets me know that I am a beloved child of God, created to be fulfilled in the road that I travel. Let the “yellow brick road” stay in Oz, I am content with my cobbled stones, paved roads and even the dirt ones that form my pathway. In answer to my very first question, yes I am happy, but more than that, I am fulfilled.